Oh.my.God. Today was probably the most uncomfortable I have ever felt at work. During breakfast hours, I noticed this really ugly, mutant freak staring at me. Now, normally I would never say such mean things about a person, but wow. This guy totally creeped me out. He did not ONE time look away from me. I would busy myself and look up and there he was, staring away. I could feel my entire body tensing up because it was making me so uncomfortable, but I ignored it as much as I could and finally I glanced up and he was gone. Or was he?! No!! He had sidled up to the desk without making any noise and scared the shit out of me. I actually jumped and made a small shrieking noise but managed to pull of an awkward smile and ask him if he needed help with anything. He just stood there with this smirk on his face like he had just murdered someone and gotten away with it. After a solid minute (it's a long time if you're standing in silence with an axe murder who is eye raping the shit out of you), he started telling me he was in town for work. The whole time I was thinking how incredibly terrifying this man was and that I did not give a fuck why he was in town. He wasn't terrifying in the sense that he was a giant man that looked mean because he was actually kind of short. He was a little pudgy, bald and wore glasses but his face was BUSTED and his teeth didn't even look they could be human teeth. Maybe a weird fishy, serpent's teeth, but not a human's. I'm pretty sure he was an inspiration for an X-Files episode because GOD DAMN! Wait for it, people, wait for it. Apparently he had been watching me ALL WEEK. I almost died. He said "I saw you were wearing a button down shirt on Monday and Tuesday and a t-shirt today and yesterday." My heart fell to my toes. How could I have missed a mutant such as this staring at me all week?! I explained that I wore a t-shirt on Wednesday because I spilled coffee all over myself and made a joke about being clumsy and then asked him one more time if everything was ok or if he needed help. He just laughed and replied with, "Yeah, I think I saw you trip in the hall on Tuesday." WHAT.THE.FUCK. Apparently, I have the ugliest stalker in the whole world and he lurks around so as not to make his presence known. I was so weirded out, I just pretended I was getting a call so he would stop talking to me. Unfortunately, he stood at the desk until I hung up on my fake caller. When I started to go in the back room and pretend to be making copies, he said it. He said the creepiest thing a stranger has ever said to me. "I notice you wear a sports bra with your t-shirts but a regular bra with your button downs." ALERT.ALERT.CODE FUCKING RED. I just stared at him and I know if I didn't already look nervous and uncomfortable, I definitely did then. I wanted that freak to crawl back into water ooze he crawled out of. He just kept staring and smirking and finally walked away after 5 minutes of me not saying one word and shuffling through papers like I was looking for something. After he left, I spent the entire rest of my day checking around corners, watching the camera like a fucking cop on a stakeout and constantly looking over my shoulder. I even made sure I didn't go in the stairwell alone just in case he happened to pop up. I saw him when I was helping one of the janitors clean up some coffee and completely ignored the fact that he even existed. I could just feel him staring at me though. When I went back to the desk, he lurked around the corner again and did his uncomfortable eye raping/smirking combination until I was forced to ask if he needed anything. He said no and just kept standing there. It was like the morning all over again!! When he decided he had made me fidget enough, he said "We're all going to this little cafe downtown if you want to come when you get off." HELL NO, UNCLE FESTER. I declined in the politest way I could because I would have gotten fired if I told him I didn't go on dates that ended with me being found in a ditch a week later after being tortured to death in his basement. I know this post is a little vulgar but I cannot put into words how incredibly nervous and uncomfortable this guy made me. If this was a Criminal Minds episode, he would be the creepiest, weirdest unsub ever. Anyway, the lurker finally left and I haven't seen him anymore but I just know he'll pop up when I least expect it.... and I'll be waiting... with mace.
No comments:
Post a Comment